😂 Trending Reddit Jokes - August 18, 2026

[722 pts] “‘Sir, sir,’” they said, these beautiful, strong, manly light-bulb changers. And let me tell you, the bulges in their jeans. You never saw anything like it. Not since Arnold Palmer. ‘Sir,’ they said. ‘It’s never been this bright before. Thank you, sir.’”

[417 pts] They don't change it, they just beat the room for being black.

[80 pts] First the would deny it was dark in the room. Then they would deflect, if it was dark in the room it’s because Obama turned off the lights. Then Biden refused to buy new light bulbs. Then they are saving the country by not using electricity (as they fire up a new data center). Bottom line, they would never take responsibility for actually changing the lightbulb. That some illegal immigrants job.

[32 pts] So did you get conjugational visits?

[12 pts] But can you start a marriage with a dangling participle?

[12 pts] However, she was upset with me because of my poor pent manship ….

[25 pts] that is so corny lol

[9 pts] Thank you, I'm a bit reclusive but I enjoyed my time :) xx

[4 pts] He would have stayed longer, but he had to tie up some loose threads...

[4 pts] Give the baby some heat!

[3 pts] His family was a bit seedy.

[3 pts] Mexican weather feather forecast .. chili tonight & hot tamale

[2 pts] "I said to my girlfriend, 'Babe?' Well... we had nicknames. She said, 'Yes, Paul Bunyan?'" --Emo Philips

[1 pts] I like that one. Paul's a lumberjack and he's OK. He sleeps all night and he works all day. He cuts down trees, he eats his lunch, and goes to the lavatory. On Wednesdays he goes shopping and has buttered scones with tea.

[64 pts] In the version I heard, they weren't a priest and rabbi, just 2 ordinary guys. One says: "You look shaken up. Maybe you'd like a drink to calm your nerves?" I like yours better.

[146 pts] I found this in the Hugging Face r/jokes archive in 2017. So far I've found three versions there: two have the rabbi "winning" and one has the priest doing so. I haven't found any version of this in any of my joke books.

[22 pts] # 234 , the priest retelling this to us from his jail cell

[439 pts] nice to see a joke like this where the punchline isn't cheating

[60 pts] Surprisingly wholesome, in its way.

[284 pts] I get it! Sally thought he said "hard on"!

[47 pts] Tired of dark humor. Prefer jokes that brighten the mood

[88 pts] I like it. Subverts expectations.

[13 pts] I broke a light bulb today. I suppose I'm in for seven years of bad ideas.

[196 pts] A counterfeiter’s equipment goes haywire one day and prints out a stack of eighteen dollar bills before he realizes and uses up all of the special paper stock that makes the funny money feel like the real thing and not ordinary copy paper. Throwing out the fake cash will just be a complete loss. He gets the idea of heading for the hill country, figuring the simple folk there won’t know any better. He decides to test it at the first general store he comes across. He rushes in and asks the storekeeper, “Can you make change for this eighteen dollar bill?” The storekeeper looks at the bill in amazement. “Eighteen dollar bill? I ain’t heerd of no eighteen dollar bill afore.” The bad guy says, “They just came out with it. Look, I’m in a hurry. Can you change the bill or not?” “Calm down there, young feller, I didn’t say I couldn’t change it. Jes’ have to be careful, what with city folk allus comin’ up into the hills, thinking they can take advantage of us poor mountaineers. Now, how did you want the change? Three sixes or two nines?”

[19 pts] Somehow I'm reminded of when James May said they need to make a $9.99 bill.

[16 pts] Cop: Oh, well, now that it's more than 20, no problem.

[108 pts] The volume of calls could be monotonically increasing.

[36 pts] continuos growth, Morty

[11 pts] I mean u could if by "average" you mean the average calls in a day based on how many total calls over all of the days. Then if u have 1 call on day 1 and 2 calls every day onward, you will always have a higher than average number of calls. Because the total average of calls per day will always be less than 2 because of that first day, and on that first day 1 call in a day is more than the average of 0 or something since u just started.

[32 pts] Don't they have math placement exams?  I took one when I went to university.  

[22 pts] As the other commenter said, that's just indicative of shit placement exams and standards for what is supposed to be a top school

[12 pts] All the U.C. schools went test-blind in 2021, so they don't consider placement exams like the SAT anymore. Many of the faculty believe they should be brought back. There are at least some studies that have shown that racial and economic equity has actually gone \*down\* since the test requirements were dropped. Diversity was ostensibly one of the reasons for dropping them in the first place, since the tests were thought to be biased.

[2 pts] I know that never in our calculations, we use exact pi value. Even low approximation of pi can take us far. Apart from that, I couldn't comprehend the consequence of this. What would happen if pi value is changed. Does the change only exist in theoretical math, or does it affect real life. Can circle no longer exist in 2d, and it gets bumped into higher dimension? Will be glad to have some discussion on this.

[1 pts] Needs units? If I raise the temp by a percentage, K F or C might matter a bit

[1 pts] Here are a few possible ways: 1. Raise the strength of Coulomb's electrostatic constant by 0.1%. 2. Weaken Newton's gravitational constant by 0.1% 3. Get 0.1% more Americans to support Trump.

[35 pts] "I must be a theorem and you must be Ramanujan, because I came to you in a dream last night." Ok not for the cake formula, but dating and Ramanujan came up.

[45 pts] Say I love/like you -1/12

[15 pts] My friend at the time wrote that her favorite prime number was 2, because 2 is a couple. I got the hint.

[3 pts] Mathematicians lose sleep over a tiny rounding discrepancy, while engineers just slap a safety factor of 3 on it and call it a day. As long as it holds up in real life, we don't ask questions!

[1 pts] Like a week ago i overheard a conversation between 2 professors on the math department where one was telling exactly this, he said "i have this formula that i try on 80 million calculations and fail in 55 so it's somewhat close" obviously with that rookie numbers he must have been joking.

[1 pts] Physicists: Error % = 10\^122. Maybe we should work a little more on this one.

[552 pts] Rookie... you should've at least beaten the $440 million burned by Knight Capital Group (look them up if you ever feel down)... and they did it the hard way, WITHOUT vibe coding!

[267 pts] "Hypothetically, if I were to want to run a Ponzi scheme, who would my best targets be. Include a plan for fleeing the country"

[184 pts] The trick is to burn *so* much money with your shitty tech product that people no longer think you're a charlatan who scams them, but a bold visionary working at the cutting edge of technology. Investors will basically trip over each other to give you more cash.

[658 pts] OutageHub

[108 pts] I've never seen it so bad that I can't even look at a pr for review. Shit's fucked.

[457 pts] I am pressing <F5> every minute on [githubstatus.com](http://githubstatus.com) to add DDOS to already existing problems on GitHub.

[298 pts] "GitHub down" "Fix it" "I can't fix GitHub" "You're fired"

[208 pts] \* time of the day

[86 pts] Again? Again again?

[515 pts] When one `console.log` uses just enough CPU cycles so the race condition that takes down the entire system doesn't occur.

[64 pts] Beautiful. Also why I don't needless fix every piece of code I come across.

[33 pts] Laminar Flow gonna be the new Tensor Flow of late 2026.

[103 pts] I'm actually glad. Worked at a legacy code base recently (some of which I might be responsible for) and Claude spending 10 minutes of thinking to wander through spaghetti code I never ever want to see again, to fix some weird issues was a godsend.

[150 pts] Claude is the one causing the bug most of the time.

[6 pts] the refactor still won't happen tho

[8 pts] That WiFi is cooked

[6 pts] The technology here is really cookin!

[4 pts] Love the pun. Wunderbar

[6 pts] Fire, exclamation mark, fire, exclamation mark.

[4 pts] Groan 🙄 You're fired, punster! 😁

[5 pts] Must be a sine from god

[6 pts] Not to be confused with atan line.

[6 pts] Math puns are a sine of mental illness.

[6 pts] Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

[4 pts] …when you’re having pun.

[1 pts] I hate that I love this

[4 pts] So, it's a fence post?

[2 pts] Reel to reel tape players? Did they take 58 years to fall off?

[2 pts] I take a fence! In fact, I'm gonna take all the fence and leave none for anyone else

[3 pts] Why not a ladder from the first marriage?

[2 pts] I thought it was going to be “grab a stepladder so you can help your uncle jack off the horse.”

[2 pts] The boy's uncle might jack off a horse, but he draws the line at peeing on a horse.

[4 pts] A bad golfer goes >WHACK< “DAMN!” A bad skydiver goes “DAMN!” >WHACK<

[4 pts] Both skydiving and sexual intercourse can change the world’s population by one!!

[2 pts] This joke landed hard

[4 pts] There are only two kinds of people in the world. Those that can extrapolate.

[1 pts] That's my kind of

[1 pts] Proves the hypothesis

[1 pts] So, the ruminant is true…

[1 pts] Indian or western?

[1 pts] 🎵They decide and the shotgun sings the song!🎵

[1 pts] OP (Avnish_15) sent the following text as an explanation why they posted this here: --- > Like what is even the connection between an empty seat and ipad? ---

[3138 pts] Call back to another reddit post long ago. https://preview.redd.it/c21si7wfkzjh1.jpeg?width=447&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=172562ecd9bb7ba17078e5030cc1093fcb11bdee

[161 pts] I’m not chronically online, but I remember this post that’s being referenced because I wholeheartedly know I would have also not seen that iPad lol

[1 pts] OP (Effective-Effort-503) sent the following text as an explanation why they posted this here: --- > I reply someones comment but you delete my post ---

[909 pts] Middle child felt so ignored over the years that only a grandiose gesture would make up for it?

[187 pts] I'm too early :(

[1 pts] OP (Expensive-Mistake351) sent the following text as an explanation why they posted this here: --- > I don't understand what it means if it gets to 100 and why there would be an accident. ---

[342 pts] Typical tire pressure is usually around 30-40 psi. These are so overfilled that if he hits a pothole, the tires would explode dangerously, and the joke is that it would launch him into the sky and hit an airplane.

[70 pts] The driver thinks the numbers are percentages. They're not. They measure pressure per square inch. They should be around 32 for a car tire. That means these tires have about 3x the intended pressure in them. Hitting a pothole could make one of these tires blow in a small explosion. Or, hyperbolically, it would launch it into the air high enough to get into an accident with a plane.

[1 pts] OP (Feeling_Valuable5239) sent the following text as an explanation why they posted this here: --- > Whats the link between moving the rock, time and these characters? I didn't get it ---

[14 pts] The joke is that doing something in the past will change stuff in the future. That is Mario and Sonic switching styles. 

[5 pts] Monic and Sario

[1 pts] OP (fxjdgjdoij) sent the following text as an explanation why they posted this here: --- > I don't understand the punchline ---

[17 pts] Ewe (a name for a female sheep) sounds like you

[4 pts] I saw pigs at the farm. I thought one of them was you. Get it?!

[1 pts] u/jonnyx_10, your post does belong here!

[3335 pts] Command for gpt to commit harakiri

[2021 pts] `rm -rf /* --no-preserve-root` will delete just about every file on your system on a Unix system. At the very least it will render your system unusable without major repair. Oh, I'm the tech guy? There was a tech guy, right? Fuck it, I'm Steve from American Dad.

[1 pts] u/reg42, your post does belong here!

[2093 pts] The joke is that political philosophy books are just for beginners. A real Master's degree in geopolitics is spending 20 minutes in a taxi listening to the driver's theories

[254 pts] Well, my master degree's thesis about cinema and Korea is turning out useful. (EDIT: slight correction, I know this because I organized an Asian film festival in my city) The reference is to a very famous film from 2017: "A Taxi Driver". It's an historical south Korean film set during the Gwangju Uprising, a revolt that took place at the beginning of one of the various extreme right dictatorships that South Korea had, in 1980. Gwangju is a region that for some reason has a strong leftist political support. Even during the war many from that area voluntarily joined the North Korean Army when the place was occupied in the first period of the conflict, and many remained in the north after the army retreated. When there was the coup an uprising started in Gwangju, and a German journalist in Seoul had some insight about what was going to happen. Despite everybody telling him to stay away he was able to reach the place thanks to a taxi driver. As soon as they arrived in Gwangju they found themselves involved in the uprising and in the subsequent military action, that involved the paratroopers shooting on the protesters and killing around 2500 people. They were hunting foreign journalists and the taxi driver went all out in saving the guy's ass by driving him around and out of the place. The few informations that we had about what happened were thanks to that journalist and his trip with the taxi driver, with which he totally lost contact and to this today has not been found. In 2016 there were political demonstrations where people were asking about truth concerning those facts, and still the government was shy about admitting the details about the military involvement. This film was made in that period and had to deal with a lot of pressure: the main actor has basically been cut out of any relevant South Korean film after that. So the gag is: the beginner level of political studies is studying classical political essays. The advanced level is taking a taxi in south Korea to see by yourself wtf is going on, and risking life for that. This is the film: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Taxi_Driver

[1 pts] u/Candid-Illustrator89, your post does belong here!

[1346 pts] Never made sense to me, they have both.

[721 pts] Man idk. I am a man and I like lookin at gals' butts, and am straight, and am kind of a lefty, so I guess I can't help you other than to say I exist.

[1 pts] Remember when r/PeterExplainsTheJoke wasn’t a meme? Pepperidge Farm remembers… Does this post belong in our subreddit? If so, **please upvote this comment!** Otherwise, **downvote this comment!** Then maybe you go out and buy yourself some of those distinctive Milano cookies. ---- (*Vote is ending in approximately 14 hour*)

[1598 pts] Never look a gift horse in the mouth. Giggity.

[88 pts] https://preview.redd.it/94kr3kzcs1kh1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0f3596adf4535f8ff68a7167d6047017fc60a399

[1 pts] u/bot_prestativo, your post does belong here!

[159 pts] A lot of stretch guesses here! The joke is, those are two wireless mics and a receiver, the participants are doing a podcast. They’re asking how much they’re paying their parents for rent at home, on Supreme branded goods, which are hugely expensive. It’s a take on rich kids with hobby podcasts who have no financial responsibilities.

[1002 pts] Well that thing saying "Supreme" is going in the *charge* port of a phone, so I'm guessing the answer is a lot.

[1 pts] There would not have been any way to make her happy. 

[1 pts] Some people aren't happy unless they're miserable. This customer sounds like one of those people.

[1 pts] She planned on not tipping, no matter what.

[1 pts] I love this. You are a genius.

[1 pts] I asked the insurance claims handler which water damage they were calling for. It was 3 different pipes within 4 months and I honestly lost track.

[1 pts] Slumlords hate this one simple trick..

[1 pts] Was the prof petty enough to have you to redo the assignment? I hope you at least got a good grade out of it

[1 pts] \> he was riding his bike home from work, thinking about what I did and he was revoking my 'victory' by changing the rules of the assignment. Therefore, my entry was 'invalid'. This clearly violates *the core principle of retroactivity by law*. In my country this is protected by constitution (a law cannot have retroactive effect if it worsens the person's situation, however it can have retroactive effect if it does improve a person's situation)

[1 pts] He changed his rules after the contest, riding home on a effing bike. You won by the stated rules.

[1 pts] A smartass to the nth degree...

[1 pts] I wouldn’t have said you were a smart ass. I would have written an OFI to control the post it document with a doc number, rev, and date. Just make it all clean and tidy.

[1 pts] Well, you were being a smart ass, but there's no reason for her to point that out as if it were a bad thing!

[1 pts] What was the weird music your coworker was into?

[1 pts] Love that the VP had the authority to completely overlook the hypocrisy 😆

[1 pts] I used to work for a US-based bank which had several offices in other countries. In some of the countries hold music was required, whether by company policy or local regulation, I am not sure. But the reason for this was that some phone connections weren’t that great and crosstalk might be heard. You didn’t want to be on hold listening to someone else’s private business. The downside of this was when someone from a hold-music requiring country joined a conference call and later put their line on hold the entire conference would be treated to the hold music over and over. And some of them weren’t musical but were actually ads for the bank.

[1 pts] This is a friendly reminder to comment with a link to the **recipe** on which the review is found; do not link the review itself. And while you're here, why not review the [/r/ididnthaveeggs rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ididnthaveeggs/about/sidebar)? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ididnthaveeggs) if you have any questions or concerns.*

[672 pts] These people have a phone in their hand but can’t look up a single thing.

[40 pts] https://www.loveandoliveoil.com/2022/02/sour-cream-chocolate-cake.html

[1 pts] This is a friendly reminder to comment with a link to the **recipe** on which the review is found; do not link the review itself. And while you're here, why not review the [/r/ididnthaveeggs rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ididnthaveeggs/about/sidebar)? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ididnthaveeggs) if you have any questions or concerns.*

[18 pts] >Grams are not millilitres I was hoping that I would open the recipe and they would be talking about water measurements, lmao (because in the case of water, they are the same).

[53 pts] Using mL for a solid ingredient is wild, ngl.

[1 pts] This is a friendly reminder to comment with a link to the **recipe** on which the review is found; do not link the review itself. And while you're here, why not review the [/r/ididnthaveeggs rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ididnthaveeggs/about/sidebar)? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ididnthaveeggs) if you have any questions or concerns.*

[68 pts] That is a distinctly different flavor profile change but from reading the whole recipe I think their substitution would still work. Dried fenugreek leaves have a really unique aroma and flavor, so even mint or other herbs/leafy greens wouldn't come close.

[36 pts] The recipe calls for kasoori methi, which is dried and crushed fenugreek leaves used as a spice. You don't want something green and leafy there, so while curry powder isn't a great substitution it's not as wild as you might think.

[1 pts] **Please report this post if:** * There is no audible laughter involved * Video is funny because of a 'joke' or situation - not the actual **laughter** * There is no audio (Images & GIFs included) * Laughter is edited in from a different source * No timestamp in the title for a laugh occurring at specific time (long videos) * Laughter is not on good terms (dickishness, bullying) * It's a compilation Read more about the [rules of this subreddit here](https://www.reddit.com/r/contagiouslaughter/about/rules/). We have a discord server!! Join us here: https://discord.gg/VruY5kvcmc *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ContagiousLaughter) if you have any questions or concerns.*

[295 pts]  Obligatory

[134 pts] Would you eat a moose knuckle?

[1 pts] **Please report this post if:** * There is no audible laughter involved * Video is funny because of a 'joke' or situation - not the actual **laughter** * There is no audio (Images & GIFs included) * Laughter is edited in from a different source * No timestamp in the title for a laugh occurring at specific time (long videos) * Laughter is not on good terms (dickishness, bullying) * It's a compilation Read more about the [rules of this subreddit here](https://www.reddit.com/r/contagiouslaughter/about/rules/). We have a discord server!! Join us here: https://discord.gg/VruY5kvcmc *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ContagiousLaughter) if you have any questions or concerns.*

[48 pts] Omfg this laugh might be my favorite individual person’s laugh I’ve ever heard on this subreddit 😂 well done

[31 pts] did......did that dude just.....hyuk!

[1 pts] **Please report this post if:** * There is no audible laughter involved * Video is funny because of a 'joke' or situation - not the actual **laughter** * There is no audio (Images & GIFs included) * Laughter is edited in from a different source * No timestamp in the title for a laugh occurring at specific time (long videos) * Laughter is not on good terms (dickishness, bullying) * It's a compilation Read more about the [rules of this subreddit here](https://www.reddit.com/r/contagiouslaughter/about/rules/). We have a discord server!! Join us here: https://discord.gg/VruY5kvcmc *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ContagiousLaughter) if you have any questions or concerns.*

[12 pts] “AHA!! 🤓☝🏾”

[5 pts] Aha!

[3 pts] r/WeWantWeights

[62 pts] P

[33 pts] The local gentry in Washington years ago changed the sign on the DQ from "brownie batter" to "brown eye batter".

[23 pts] They get their jalapenis from Taylor Farms

[12 pts] This is just vandalism

[6 pts] A bit beyond mild.

[1 pts] Oh, that's the Liverpool owner!

[1 pts] No, it's more like r/dadjokes